you guys were way drunker than both of me
I am in a vortex of obligation.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
