By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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