woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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