C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Randomize