so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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