I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
