Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize