Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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