Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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