In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
