I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
