sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
