we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
