I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
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what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
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Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
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