I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
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