I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
