do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
