Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
We had to coat check the pizza.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
that is very illegal...i love you.
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