me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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