no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
