I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
