I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Non-Jews are for practice
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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