he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
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