Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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