If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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