i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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