these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
