Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
