apparently the secret to your success is patron
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize