Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Who died my cat blue again?
Randomize
