spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize