I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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