I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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