It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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