atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
