I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
