we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
