i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
