She announced her abortion via fbk
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
