suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.