I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.