Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
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I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
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I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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