so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
