Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
