She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
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