HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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