i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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