At least make sure they are 18
Why
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
