is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize