I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize