his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
