he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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